5 Ways To Stay Happy

Most people have no control over their emotional well-being. They feel ecstatic when good stuff happens and depressed when things go wrong. Their lives are roller coaster rides: sometimes up, sometimes way down.

But what if you could be happy no matter what happens?

You’d stay calm when your car breaks down and your boss shouts at you. You’d stop feeling lonely when there’s no one to talk to on a rainy day. You’d never lose sleep over a relationship that isn’t working out.

If being in command of your emotional state sounds good, take charge of your life with these 5 easy tips.

1. Stop Chasing and Start Living

Many people feel they need something – more money, new clothes, better relationships – to make them happy. They think: “If only I had that other thing, I would be complete”. Instead of enjoying life, they chase a vague idea of happiness.

But even when you get everything that’s supposed to make you happy, life will have ups and downs. Today your car breaks down; tomorrow you pull your calf muscle. If you look hard enough, you’ll always find reasons to be miserable.

So stop chasing; start living. Wanting more is fine, but don’t forget to relax and enjoy life for what it is – in the present.

2. Assume Responsibility

We often blame other people, circumstances and even objects for our problems. “I’m this way because my dad didn’t love me enough”; “I hate my stupid car for breaking down all the time.”

But life is full of different people and situations: some are good and some are bad. Unless you assume responsibility for your life, you’ll always be at the mercy of those circumstances.

Instead of blaming others for what’s wrong in your life, focus on what you can do to make things better. Never sulk and try not to feel sorry for yourself too often. It’s your responsibility to make yourself happy: nobody else’s.

3. Stop Seeking Stimulation

We live in a world of endless stimulation. Between movies, video games and the internet, something exciting’s always going on. Sometimes, this makes us feel bored and restless when we run out of stuff to do.

If you want to be happy, overcome this addiction. Develop the ability to enjoy life in its entirety – even when the stimulation stops.

Appreciate the sky you see on your way to work each day. Cherish each moment you spend with the people you love. Savor every bite of food you get to eat. Enjoying every experience will give you many new reasons to be happy.

4. Take Action

Taking action is the logical consequence of assuming responsibility for your life (Point #2).

When you want to lose weight – start jogging. Someone’s being rude to you? Tell them to stop. If you’re unhappy with your job, start looking for a new one. Get behind the steering wheel of your own life!

This site has plenty of advice that will help you take action the smart way. Educate yourself and commit to find happiness no matter what it takes. With enough hard work and dedication, you really can create the life you want.

5. Expect Nothing

We expect others to treat us better than we treat them. We work out a few times and stress because we don’t instantly look like models. We want to live like rockstars, ignoring the fact that only a few people reach that level of success.

In short, we tend to have unreasonable expectations. The difference between what we feel entitled to and what we actually get is the source of much misery.

Accept life in its entirety; stop thinking in terms of what should be and accept what is. When you live without entitlement, every good thing becomes a wonderful surprise. Even better, expecting nothing means never being disappointed.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, bad things will happen to you. You will have highs, lows and lots of mediums in your life. You’re only human, just like everybody else.

But follow the 5 tips in this post and you’ll be well on your way to staying happy – no matter what happens.

How To Avoid Relationship Meltdown By QueenBella

When it comes to getting reliable relationship advice, who can you trust?

Everyone has their own opinion, usually based on bitter experience, or long-term love. So it's lucky that lots of research has been done in this area, and we're now able to offer relationship advice that's based on research rather than hearsay.

Read on:

How to Tell If Your New Relationship Will Last

How you start discussions with your partner is absolutely vital in determining your future prospects together. It's not how much you argue, but how you argue that determines your relationship prognosis.

According to this well regarded research, how you conduct the 'startup phase' (the first two minutes) of disagreements or disputes reliably predicts your chances of being together 5 years later. Generally, the more negative emotions you display during this initial period, the more likely your relationship is to fail.

Apparently, the best predictor of a relationship that will survive is a female partner that can initiate discussion of a problem 'softly' (that is without negative emotion or criticism), and can then use humour to smooth the way as the discourse progresses.

The 'hard startups' that spell relationship disaster are:

A) Criticism rather than complaint

Attacking statements starting with 'you' are criticisms. A complaint would often start with an 'I' statement and be far less confrontational. Example: "You always spoil everything!" would be a criticism. Where as: "I really don't like it when you refuse to speak to my mother!" would be a specific complaint and not a global attack on the partner's character.

B) Defensiveness

Another major predictor of eventual relationship breakdown is over-defensiveness. If someone begins yelling as soon as their partner broaches a subject and feels overly threatened or attacked (whether or not they are being criticised or complained to) and this is a continuing and regular feature of the couple's interactions then the relationship is in crisis.

C) Contempt

Name calling, face pulling, cursing at, insulting your partner and basically behaving as if you are revolted by them can be termed 'contempt.' Again John Gottman and his researchers (1) in Seattle found that if this was a regular feature in the startup phase of a disagreement then the relationship's days were very likely to be numbered and the couple much less likely to last.

D) Withdrawal or 'stone walling

Emotionally withdrawing or stonewalling, 'closing your ears' or 'shutting off' when a partner is complaining is another huge predictor of breakdown. Whist criticising was generally more of a female trait, men used stonewalling more. The partner may withdraw during conversations by 'switching off' or ultimately spend more and more time away from the relationship as a way of 'escaping.'

Rather surprisingly, if even one of these factors (A to D) is present regularly in disputes, the outlook for the relationship is poor.

Men Don't Like Unconditional Love

The same team showed that a relationship is more likely to fail if the woman shows affection to her partner when he is displaying negative emotions towards her. The advice says that an angry response to contempt from her partner is more likely to contribute to a healthy long-term relationship.

Do As You're Told!

Another important factor for relationship survival is the man accepting suggestions, recommendations and advice from his wife or partner.

Don't Get In Too Deep

Recent studies of elderly couples (a logical place to start when looking for good relationship advice!) has shown that these couples often don't listen very carefully to what the other is saying when expressing negative emotion.

They also tend to ignore their own feelings about the relationship unless they consider that something absolutely must be done. This threshold is set much higher than in younger couples.

So the typical advice of agony aunts to 'air issues' and get 'every thing out in the open' doesn't, after all, make for healthy long-term relationships. Agreeing to disagree and knowing which subjects to steer clear of is a key relationship skill.

Avoid Too Much Lovey-Dovey!

Whilst physical affection is certainly important in a relationship, older partners in long-term relationships express less affection towards each other, whilst reporting a greater level of relationship satisfaction.

Change the subject

Another key factor in arguments within relationships that survive is the habit of changing the subject once the discussion has 'run its course'. This 'quick shift' lessens the amount of negative emotion experienced and decreases the likelihood of later rumination. It also conveys the message "We can argue, and still get on with each other." Thus, the argument is contained and does not contaminate the whole relationship.

Avoid Too Much Big Talk

It seems that younger couples are much more likely to consider their problems as highly important and to 'dig deep' into them, seeing their partner as at least partly responsible. Older people in successful relationships are more likely to keep their own problems to themselves, and if they consider them important enough to discuss will do it in 'small talk' fashion, rather than getting too worked up about them.

Relationship Advice Roundup

The great thing about this type of relationship advice is that it is A) reliable and B) able to be acted upon.

To improve the long-term prospects of your relationship, check whether any of the above factors are present in your interactions with your partner. If they are, drive them out! Have a zero-tolerance policy and come up with creative ways to approach things differently.

And you might want to have your partner read this article too!

Relationship Tips

What's the key to successful relationships? Here, QueenBella reveals the simple things you need to know to deepen your partnership and make your relationship work

1. Without quality time, your relationship will not survive. Carve out at least half an hour always when you the two of you spend time exclusively together.

2. You will both need security, comfort. A good relationship is built on compromise and a great deal of give and take on both sides.

3. Keep your dependence and independence in balance. Tell and show your partner how much you need him, but don't cling, as that can make your partner feel trapped.

4. Encourage him to listen to you, by showing appreciation when he does. By the same token, show interest when he talks to you. Be aware that most men aren't mentally programmed for conversation in the way women are. They need more silence and internal time.

5. Make him appreciate you. Don't wait for a spontaneous compliment, but say something good about yourself and ask for his agreement.

6. Teach him, preferably early in your relationship, exactly how to give you a fail-safe orgasm because it's unlikely he'll find out alone. If you don't yet know yourself, find out.

7. Learn to do the one thing that is most likely to restore good feeling in your relationship - giving your partner a genuine, loving and approving smile.

8.Often those subtle quirks that first attracted you to your partner can, with time, turn around and become toe-curlingly annoying habits. Learn to love him, warts and all.

9. Hidden resentments poison a relationship; so if something bothers you, say it. Remember that while men are wary of emotional conversations, they love to find solutions. Express your problem and then ask him to help you find the answer.

10. Learn that punishing your partner won't work. It may make you feel better to give him a hard time, but it will actually make him dig his heels in more. A better tactic is to reward the things you like and ignore what you don't like.

Ways To Make Your Relationship Work

Get counseling, if needed to become healthy. In order for a relationship to be healthy you have to be healthy yourself. Get into counseling; find a friend who can help you grow~someone you trust to tell you the truth. Although they might be tougher to hear from, a non-friend works well here.
2
Give 100% to the relationship and expect nothing in return. This is unconditional love. You have to know this kind of love before you can give it away! If you both are doing this the relationship will grow. This means spending the time you give your partner with your partner, enjoying and appreciating the relationship as it is. This does not mean centering your life around your relationship, neglecting your job, your friends, your hobbies and your own needs. Give what you can give freely without sacrifice or resentment and take care of yourself without expecting your partner to take care of you. If you don't take care of yourself, you'll get run down to the point you can't take care of your partner or anyone else.
3
Address hurts. When you feel hurt and want to get angry, you have to be willing to look for the cause of the behavior that hurt you and address the cause. This is like counting to ten, waiting to speak before you act. If you need to get angry you can always do it later. But when you get at the cause of the behavior you can help the person understand what happened and tell them you got hurt. Now you are building the relationship and not doing damage to it.
4
Understand the idea of personal boundaries and hold yours. Make them clear to your partner including the negotiable gray areas that are part of any healthy relationship. Respect your partner's boundaries. When you're hurt or angry, stop and reflect on why you're hurt or angry. Identify whether the issue is that you want to cross your partner's boundaries or whether it's your partner invading yours. If you want something unreasonable, like crossing their boundaries, understanding that can help you let go of that desire. If you want something reasonable, like holding your own boundaries, then stand up for yourself assertively.
5
Do not insult your partner in any arguments. Just don't call names or label them. Don't say "You're lazy. Focus on your own feelings, needs and points. "I feel as if I have to do all the housecleaning" is not insulting. "You lazy slob, you never do anything around the house" is insulting. If you behave this way consistently, you can establish the pattern.
6
Translate any insults from your partner in an argument into what is really being said. "I'm mad because you don't do enough housecleaning to please me" is a translation of the lazy slob insult above into information terms. Accepting that the insults just mean "I'm angry and frustrated" is vital. They are not true as such, they are a slanted description of a situation your partner perceives as real. It may not even be true, if so then communicating without insults could help resolve that conflict. If you clean more efficiently than your partner and finish the same tasks in half the time, it may look like you're doing less even though you're accomplishing more. Conversely, if your partner's better at cleaning, your results may disappoint your partner even though you put in the same amount of time and effort. Discussing these issues without blaming or insulting is "problem solving mode" and an important element of any healthy relationship.
7
There will always be conflict in all relationships. When both partners are comfortable and happy with the same method of conflict resolution, they tend to be happier together no matter what others think of it. Some couples insult each other constantly in a lighthearted way because neither takes those insults seriously - and know that if the insults stop, the issue is a serious one. Find your comfort zone and your partner's and explore different ways of handling conflicts till you find what works for you.
8
Identify any hurtful behaviors or addictions that are part of the relationship. Become aware of the types of mind games addicts play. If you did not grow up in a home with an addict or alcoholic, it's easy to be blind sided by the games addicts play. Read about addiction and find checklists online to examine the hurtful behaviors within your relationship, both yours and your partner's. Sometimes healthy behavior can hurt a lot when a relationship is changing, but that hurt is necessary to grow past it. Whoever tries to break the pattern will be seen as acting hurtfully or selfishly.
9
Look for ways that you may be enabling any hurtful behaviors or addictions by giving too much.
10
Look at whether you may be attempting to control your partner's life. If the final decisions on things always go your way, that's a sign of codependence. There's give and take in a healthy relationship. If your partner never does anything without consulting you, that's a danger sign and something to work on.

A Love Letter To The One You Think Is Worth Waiting For! *wink*

A love letter to the one I’m longing to see~
This letter is part of my 30 Letter in 30 Days blog challenge. This is for Day 9, a letter for someone you wish you could meet. I’m sharing it here, for those who are waiting and longing too. Let’s keep holding on… ♥

To my one and only,

I have been longing for you ever since I knew how it was to long for someone. To many shooting stars, in birthday candles, fallen eyelashes, in dandelions and flower petals, I have wished for you. For you are out there somewhere, far away in time and place, but you are also here in my heart. Shakespeare said: Journeys end in lovers meeting. I cannot see you yet. The end for us is a long way ahead, but even now I am walking to you my love. Every day, every step, every beat of my heart, I know that the Lord is bringing me nearer to you. The road is long and sometimes I am weary. I long for you so much it feels like I am holding my breath. I long for you to be here, to be near, to be known. I can only dream you, and wish you and wait for you.

So patiently, I will wait . For I know – I am sure – every second of the wait will be worth it. I’ll hold true to the promise I’ve made. For that promise is sacred and it is not in vain. I put my faith to the author of love, of this love, that He will see us through.

I will pray for you as I am waiting. I hope you will (pray) and are (waiting), too. ‘Cause as I walk this road there are still many steps to take, many other paths to go through. As I dream of finding you, there are still other dreams to reach and destinies to be realized. For when I finally find you, I want to be ready. Ready to take on our destiny. God will lead us to that, in perfect time. And when that time comes, I know it will be grand and far-reaching than what I’ve ever dreamed of. Until then, I will be here, praying  and steadfastly waiting. I will keep on longing for you and wishing on stars and dandelions, until every wish comes true and I will finally meet you.

Coping With A Heart Break

Cope With a Heartbreak
It is mostly true that only time can heal a broken heart. However how we act while heartbroken can effect the amount of pain we feel. The following tips will work towards minimizing the pain and speed the healing process.
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StepsTips and WarningsVideo
1
Get rid of such objects that remind you of the person who broke your heart. Return, sell, burn, or throw them away. Get rid of photos, letters, emails, and other such items.
2
Avoid that person if possible. Try to minimize meetings with your former love.
3
Recognize the reasons why you feel bad, think of ways in which some of these reasons can be eliminated or avoided.
4
Remember why the romance ended. The relationship ended because you deserve better.
5
Remember there will be better days ahead.
6
Spend more time with your friends and family.
7
If you do not workout or exercise, start doing that, as it helps reduce stress and depression. Exercise will help improve your body and self image.
8
Take a bath or shower when feeling very unhappy.
9
Start a new hobby or pastime. The pleasure of accomplishing something will counter act to the feelings of sadness.
10
Keep busy.
11
Find activities to do that make you happy. Stay away from sad movies and the like.
12
Listen to music that gets adrenaline rushing, do not listen to slow, sad or romantic songs.
13
Meet new people, you might find someone who will heal your heart.

How to stay in love with your Partner

One of the things that still leave me puzzled , is how two people who were so in love with each other and were excited at the thought of seeing each before they got married, can degenerate to the point where at the very least become bored with themselves and have to endure each other’s company later in marriage.”
“The human emotions although often described as fleeting are very strong.Kings have been known to abdicate thrones because of the intensity of their feelings for another, Generals have lost wars because they were “love sick” and Secret agents have been found to have divulged national secrets because they were in love”
An Emotional need is a craving that when not satisfied, leaves you with a feeling of unhappiness and frustration. ”
“When our most important emotional needs are being met by our partners there is the feeling of “in loveness” or we “fall in love.” When they are not met we “fall out of love.” At this time we are emotionally obsessed with each other.”
“”Daily responsibilities, chores, bills, children, irritating habits all begin to show up and these things begin to tip the partners into times of irritation, snapping and so on which begin to cause massive withdrawals in their love banks which leads them into the eventual feeling of falling “out of love.”
“This feeling of “in love-ness” can also be stimulated and maintained no matter how long the couple have been married for if they keep making love deposits into each other’s Love Banks or Tanks.”
“Since time and effort put in at the beginning of the relationship is what caused the romantic sparks to fly and be ignited in the first place, the same ingredients if carefully and deliberately applied can help recreate that romantic atmosphere again.”
“To rebuild this much desired romantic climate in marriage, couples need to schedule time alone with each other daily, where they give each other focused and undivided attention...”
“Women often resent having sex without conversation and affection first and men resent talking and being affectionate without any hope for sex and recreation.”
“Many parents were able to provide for their children’s physical needs but were not aware of the corresponding need to meet their children’s emotional needs.”

5 Ways to Make My Boyfriend Happy

Like many women around the world, you may sometimes wonder what would make your boyfriend happy. Being in a relationship can  often be challenging and frustrating. Here are a few quick tips to make sure that communication remains open and your relationship is a happy and fruitful one.



1. Your boyfriend needs to feel that you appreciate him, and yes he needs this ego boosting on a regular basis. Complement him regularly on his positive qualities, achievements, and strengths, recognize his successes and do not dwell unnecessarily on his failures. Your boyfriend needs to know that you are proud to have him in your life and that he means the world to you. He also needs to feel capable and strong. So, every now and then, let him do manly things for you. This will help you make your boyfriend happy.

2. Men usually love sporting events; if they're not participating, then definitely watching live or on tv. As annoying as this might seem to you, it is the male way of destressing. It will definitely make a man happy to have his girlfriend along, either cheering with him at the games, or giving him his space to watch his favorite sport with his buddies.

3. Encourage your boyfriend to spend time with his male friends. This not only shows that you trust him, but also establishes your own freedom and gives you time to spend with your girlfriends. Getting approval from his male friends is very important for your boyfriend even when it comes to you, so grin and bear their jokes, even if they may not have the humor that you are used to.

4. Cook him his favorite food. The surest way to a man’s heart is definitely through his stomach.

5. One of the most important tips for keeping your boyfriend happy is to be happy yourself. If you show that you are genuinely happy to have him as your boyfriend, it will make a world of difference to the relationship.

5 Ways to Make My Boyfriend Happy

Like many women around the world, you may sometimes wonder what would make your boyfriend happy. Being in a relationship can  often be challenging and frustrating. Here are a few quick tips to make sure that communication remains open and your relationship is a happy and fruitful one.



1. Your boyfriend needs to feel that you appreciate him, and yes he needs this ego boosting on a regular basis. Complement him regularly on his positive qualities, achievements, and strengths, recognize his successes and do not dwell unnecessarily on his failures. Your boyfriend needs to know that you are proud to have him in your life and that he means the world to you. He also needs to feel capable and strong. So, every now and then, let him do manly things for you. This will help you make your boyfriend happy.

2. Men usually love sporting events; if they're not participating, then definitely watching live or on tv. As annoying as this might seem to you, it is the male way of destressing. It will definitely make a man happy to have his girlfriend along, either cheering with him at the games, or giving him his space to watch his favorite sport with his buddies.

3. Encourage your boyfriend to spend time with his male friends. This not only shows that you trust him, but also establishes your own freedom and gives you time to spend with your girlfriends. Getting approval from his male friends is very important for your boyfriend even when it comes to you, so grin and bear their jokes, even if they may not have the humor that you are used to.

4. Cook him his favorite food. The surest way to a man’s heart is definitely through his stomach.

5. One of the most important tips for keeping your boyfriend happy is to be happy yourself. If you show that you are genuinely happy to have him as your boyfriend, it will make a world of difference to the relationship.

6 Signs She's The One

At some point in every man's life, there comes a time when it’s time to find a good woman and settle down with her. It can often be hard to know if a girl is "right" for you, so here’s a list of 5 things to look for in a girl that could mean she’s the one to hang on to.


1. She's trustworthy
You don't have to think twice about opening up about personal matters and telling her intimate details about your life. She does what she says she's going to do, doesn't flake out, and she's proven that she will always be there for you through good and bad times, no matter what.


2. She makes you feel special
She makes you feel special and cared for by doing thoughtful, little things like holding your hand when you are out in public, telling you she loves you, hugging you, and listening to you, especially when you need her support. She also does special things for you like leaving you sweet love notes when you least expect it and taking you for impromptu dates to places you enjoy.


3. She makes you a better man
She knows you inside out and helps you bring out the best version of yourself. She's a great girlfriend who motivates you to achieve your dreams, talks about your potential, and inspires you to become the best man you can ever be.


4. You have great chemistry together
She is on your mind at all times and you can stare at one another and not say anything for hours. The two of you can laugh together and you share basic interests. You find yourself talking about her a lot and you feel alive and yet content when she is with you.


5. She loves you for who you are
Although there may be things about you that irritates her in everyday life, she loves you, plain and simple and doesn't want to change the essence of who you are. You can talk with her and feel like she isn’t judging you and you never have to try to impress her because you’ve already done that by just being you.

6.She likes and accepts your family members:
If its not pretence and you see how real she keeps it with your family members,showing concern about them like they are her family members too,then she sure is.

10 Signs Your Man Is Nolonger Inlove With You

If you have not been feeling loved lately, and your man’s behaviour has changed towards you lately, making you think that may be he does not love you anymore. If you are losing sleep over how your man is behaving then you need to read the ten signs below that show that he is no longer in love with you:

1. He has stopped calling you the endearing names he once called you – sweetie, honey, darling, baby, boo, etc.

2. He complains when you try to be affectionate to him. If you are sitting on the coach and you try to massage his neck or back, he tells you to stop because he is uncomfortable, or just wants you to give him some elbow room.

3. He tells you mean things that hurt your feeling in the name of trying to tell you the truth. For example, he will tell you that you are overweight and that you should try to lose weight.

4. He flirts with other girls right in your presence, and when you complain he tells you to do something about it if you don’t like how he is behaving.

5. He no longer tells you about how his day went. He does not talk to you as much as he used to in the past.

6. He goes out with his friends on weekends and never bothers to invite you.

7. He suddenly starts calling you another woman’s name – probably the woman he is now involved with – and does not apologize to you.

8. He stays out late and does not bother to explain to you where he has gone and why his coming home late.

9. He gets very angry when you accuse him of having an affair. He gets very defensive and starts shouting at you.

10. He never seems to understand why you are complaining that his behaviour toward you has changed.

If your man is acting like he no longer loves you and you have noticed that his behaviour towards you has drastically changed, chances are that he may be falling out of love with you. And if that is the case, don’t try to get him to do what he does not want to do – like staying in a relationship with. If you have told him that you don’t like the way he is treating you and he does not appear to be interested in changing his ways, then your man probably wants to move on. If that is what he wants, let him move on so that you can make room for a man that will derive joy in fulfilling your heart’s romantic desires.

10 Signs Your Man Is Nolonger Inlove With You

If you have not been feeling loved lately, and your man’s behaviour has changed towards you lately, making you think that may be he does not love you anymore. If you are losing sleep over how your man is behaving then you need to read the ten signs below that show that he is no longer in love with you:

1. He has stopped calling you the endearing names he once called you – sweetie, honey, darling, baby, boo, etc.

2. He complains when you try to be affectionate to him. If you are sitting on the coach and you try to massage his neck or back, he tells you to stop because he is uncomfortable, or just wants you to give him some elbow room.

3. He tells you mean things that hurt your feeling in the name of trying to tell you the truth. For example, he will tell you that you are overweight and that you should try to lose weight.

4. He flirts with other girls right in your presence, and when you complain he tells you to do something about it if you don’t like how he is behaving.

5. He no longer tells you about how his day went. He does not talk to you as much as he used to in the past.

6. He goes out with his friends on weekends and never bothers to invite you.

7. He suddenly starts calling you another woman’s name – probably the woman he is now involved with – and does not apologize to you.

8. He stays out late and does not bother to explain to you where he has gone and why his coming home late.

9. He gets very angry when you accuse him of having an affair. He gets very defensive and starts shouting at you.

10. He never seems to understand why you are complaining that his behaviour toward you has changed.

If your man is acting like he no longer loves you and you have noticed that his behaviour towards you has drastically changed, chances are that he may be falling out of love with you. And if that is the case, don’t try to get him to do what he does not want to do – like staying in a relationship with. If you have told him that you don’t like the way he is treating you and he does not appear to be interested in changing his ways, then your man probably wants to move on. If that is what he wants, let him move on so that you can make room for a man that will derive joy in fulfilling your heart’s romantic desires.

Best Ways For Lovers To Work It Out

1. When you're having a difficult discussion, put your angry emotions aside. You can't be logical when you're mad. If you can't contain your ire, it may be best to put talking on hold until after you calm down.

2. It's not about who's right or wrong. If you try to blame your partner or make him or her wrong, you won't find an answer. You both have to take responsibility for getting your relationship back on a positive track.

3. Look for the high road and discuss what's best for both of you. Don't settle for anything less than equality and the knowledge that you are doing the right thing for yourself and your partner.

4. Be humble and don't rub your partner's nose in a misstep. If you gently share you feelings, whichever of you is the offending party will learn from his or her mistake much easier.

5. Agree to disagree (without being disagreeable). But don't settle for less than a complete acceptance of each other's point of view. If you walk away disappointed, you have not resolved your issue. For a relationship to work, you both have to feel like you have your partner's support.

6. Always have difficult conversations in private. If you have kids, you don't want them to pick up the negativity; it can make them feel insecure. Remember that you can be heard behind closed doors, so keep the volume low and the vibe as calm as possible.

7. Before making a decision about how to handle a problem, make sure you consider all of your options. This requires some brainstorming and working together to create a positive solution. If done correctly, this process alone can heal the difficulty.

8. Don't rush to judgment. You may not be able to come up with the best answers in the moment, so sleep on it before you decide on a course of action. If you still cannot reach a meeting of the minds, put the issue aside and look at it again in a few days.

9. Trust that you can find an answer that will work for both of you. Going into the discussion with an optimistic heart and mind will make working it out much easier.

10. Consolidate the gains of your discussion. Review out loud what you agreed upon, put it in writing if it helps, and then kiss and make up.

Most people avoid difficult conversations because they fear having an uncomfortable moment. I think a bad few minutes is better than an uncomfortable life. Truth is that couples who embrace the desire to work things out have the best relationships. Period.

Best Love Poems For You!

Kiss of my Love

Your beauty overwhelms me
As I wrap my arms around you
I press your softness tight
Great passion fills my inner being
I'm captured in your embrace
Your eyes control my very soul
The touch of your lips, heaven
Forever frozen in time
All else fades into nothing

Why I Love You

You give to me hope
And help me to cope
When life pulls me down
You bring me around

You teach me to care
And help me to share
You make me honest
With kindness the best

From you I learned love
With grace from above
It's for you I live
And I want to give

You are the reason
That fills each season
When I hear love I think of you
You are my world and best friend too

I love you because you are so kind, thoughtful and caring
I love you because you are so pleasant, lovely and sharing

You made me the man I am
Thank you
 
love is in my thought

Love is blind
Love is eyed
Love is sweet
Love is bitter
Love is care
Love is hesitation
Love is bare
Love is dare
Love is peace
Love is violent
Love is clear
Love is dirty
Love is prominent
Love is contaminate
Love is heaven
Love is hell
Love is crashing
Love is sticky
Love is critical
Love is mythological
Love is brittle
Love is malleable
Love is capable
Love is stressful
Love is innocent
Love is violent
Love is best
Love is worst
Love is nothing
But love is everything
Love is god
Love is devil
Love is evil
Love is shining sun
Love is blinking moon
Love is beautiful earth
Love is the worst larva of earth
Love is hurting
Love is paining
But love is lovable and love is pain clear
Love is like this
Love is like that
Love is too much
I can not describe
Look in side dear reader
You will find love everywhere hidden but prominent when looks closer
Love is not enough to understand but its
For me is love

Qualities Of Love

Love: we need it, we want it, but how do we go about it? If we knew, our world wouldn’t be war torn, and our relationships wouldn’t be filled with conflict. Love is simple, yet enormously complex. Since learning how to love appropriately is a big entire reason we come to the physical plane, it stands to reason that it would take lifetimes to achieve. Love requires different actions with different people. A parent loves a toddler differently than an adolescent. Partnership love is even different still. Then there is the world to love, other people, plants and animals, as well as loving one’s ideals, one’s higher self, or God/Goddess. Each requires a specific set of actions to produce a specific response. In this article I will be describing the principles of partnership love.

1. CARING: honestly caring about each other’s feelings in the relationship. When you care about someone, you care about how your behavior impacts them physically and emotionally. In order to feel good about a partnership, each person must be getting emotional, mental, spiritual and physical needs met. When this is occurring, the relationship is healthy for both people and adds to each person’s self-worth and self-esteem.

2. RESPONSIBILITY: we must take responsibility for the feelings the relationship is engendering, not for the other person. The most un loving thing you can do for others is to take away their opportunity to be responsible for the impact of their actions upon others. This is called enabling. It prevents all growth and transformation. If you are enabling someone else to be dysfunctional by cushioning them from the impact of their actions, you are not loving them. Rather, you are using the relationship to get your needs met without regard to the negative impact you are having on your partner’s spiritual growth.

You are not responsible for the reality others create, but you are responsible for the reality that you allow. According to Lazaris, we create our reality by either directly causing it through our behavior, (even "accidental" behaviors), or by allowing it. By choosing to be physical, we agreed to allow ourselves to be impacted by all the rules and realities of the physical plane. It is through this impact that we experience the pain or pleasure that motivates our evolution. This means that we agreed to allow ourselves to be impacted by the behavior of others. If a few people create global destruction, everyone allowed it for their growth and will have to deal with the consequences even though the majority of us did not actively create it. On a more personal note, if your partner is wrecking the family financially because he or she is an alcoholic who is drinking up all the money, you must take responsibility for what you needed to learn by choosing to allow this reality into your life. Taking responsibility means that there is no blame. When you process the experience, you must examine how it served you, as well as whether or not you dealt with it authentically. By sharing your feelings appropriately without slandering your partner’s character, and holding him or her accountable for the consequences of their actions, both you and your partner will grow.

3. KNOWING AND LEARNING: In each relationship there is a period of getting to know your partner and learning more and more about who they are, what they want in life, their desires and dreams, and what their agenda is, both hidden and explicit. As you get to know your partner’s likes and dislikes, through your reactions you conversely get to know yourself. For example, as you get to know your partner, you may discover that you have different sexual styles. As your partner leads you into sexual arenas that he or she enjoys but you’ve never tried, you’ll find out very quickly whether or not you share the same tastes. You must constantly seek to learn more about yourself and your partner. Never become complacent thinking that you've learned all there is to know. No matter how much inner work you’ve done, there will always be more to learn about yourself. And no matter how long you are with your partner, there will always be more to learn about him or her.

4. BEING INTIMATE: All conflict is an opportunity to create greater intimacy. When conflict arises, you must state your reactions and feelings without slandering your partner’s character. Then you must be willing to take total responsibility for your feelings by processing them in an open minded way. The “I’m right and you’re wrong” way, and “you’re a jerk because you think, feel and act that way” isn’t intimacy. Rather, that’s a declaration of war that never generates a positive response. Because it’s an attack on the other person’s self-esteem, it generates counter attack. True intimacy is the ability to open-mindedly explore the stories you each tell yourself about the activity that’s causing you to have the conflict. You must also explore what I call the “story beneath the story,” which are hidden beliefs, attitudes, thoughts and feelings the story is based upon. If you can do this exploration honestly and openly, without creating defensiveness or a need to be right and make the other person wrong, you have the opportunity to truly get to know one another.

This is often difficult to do because sometimes what we discover when we honestly explore the story beneath the story are things about ourselves that we may not be proud of, or that are socially unacceptable in the culture at large. It may also force you to reveal a hidden agenda that isn’t loving, such as being in a relationship not because you love your partner but because you like their financial support, which means you are using them for personal gain. It may take great courage to share these things, but when you share them in an atmosphere of open-minded acceptance and are also willing to take responsibility for what you find, it becomes easier.

Problems arise when what is revealed is threatening to one or both people in the relationship. It is in this phase of love that you may discover that you share differing agendas, or what John Gottman, in his book The Seven Principles That Make Marriage Work, calls “irreconcilable dreams.” There is a larger story beneath the story that may reveal unexplored beliefs about personal inadequacy, a lack of self-worth, or an inability to find and live one’s own dreams. This information would cause someone to further explore where the beliefs that create these feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem came from. One must ask oneself if they are true, and what needs to be done to change the mental or circumstantial reality that is causing them if they are. It might also cause a person to explore talents and develop potentials more fully. This kind of honesty can lead to enormous growth and change, which is what eventually produces true love.

In another common example, you may discover that your partner only feels fulfilled sexually in an open relationship where they have access to many sexual partners. You, on the other hand, only feel fulfilled in a monogamous one. Although one’s religion and culture may say that open relationships are immoral, which is why it may be hard for these facts to be revealed, the truth is that as long as no one is being hurt and everyone is open and honest about what they are doing, this activity is merely a matter of preference. It will only destroy the relationship if it’s an un matching agenda or “irreconcilable dream” that the other partner can’t agree to. When we become truly intimate, we discover our unmatching agendas, as well as our matching ones. Once discovered, you enter into the fifth quality of love: respect.

5. RESPECT: This is the hardest and most determined aspect of love, especially if you have a co-dependent relationship with your partner in which property and children are involved. You must respect other people's right to be the way they are without needing or wanting to change them, even if there are parts of their personality that you don't like, don't approve of, or scare you. Trying to change. people isn't respecting their right to be who they are. Because you can't change anybody, you must accept them the way they are. If they have an agenda that you don’t share, or are behaving in a way that isn’t enjoyable to you and they do not want to change this, you must tell yourself the truth about how likely you are to feel fulfilled in the relationship. If you are not likely to feel fulfilled, you probably won’t be happy. You must then decide whether or not you want to stay in the relationship. If you decide to stay, you must do so without resentment or bitterness. If you decide to leave, you can still love them, but you will do so from afar.

Love doesn't involve manipulation. As a loving person, although you can invite change, you don't require it. You can love someone but realize that a life spent with them will ultimately be unfulfilling because you won’t be getting your needs met. In fact, if staying with someone whose behavior is un-enjoyable enables them to be unloving, it is not a loving act. This quality is the most determined, taking the greatest will and determination to do, for it isn't always easy. Anyone can do the first three steps. Step four requires a high degree of responsibility and step five the highest of all. This step challenges us to do the right thing whether it's comfortable or not. People who can do the first three steps but not the fourth or fifth are just acting like they are loving when they actually aren't. Though you may say you love each other, you are actually deceiving yourselves. In fact, if you are confused in a relationship because things aren’t adding up, the chances are good that there are hidden agendas that aren’t being expressed and may even be actively denied.

6. COMMITMENT: This is intricately linked to intimacy. In fact, until you've created intimacy, commitment is meaningless. To be committed to someone is to take intense and total responsibility with them for the reality that you are jointly creating. In other words, the commitment is about continuously creating and maintaining the love that exists between you by authentically expressing your feelings and concerns and processing your conflicts together. When you commit to someone, it means that you are willing to process your conflict with them no matter what they do, how much they hurt you, or let you down. This kind of commitment can only come after you’ve thoroughly engaged the other five actions. You must first have been caring and responsible with and for each other. You must have learned more and more about each other and, when conflicts arise, become more intimate. Then you must choose to respect your partner, either choosing to love them from afar if the relationship won’t ultimately fulfill you, or staying in it without resentment or bitterness and without needing your partner to change. If you stay, you can then make a commitment to continuously care about how your behavior impacts your partner and to express your feelings when your partner has a negative impact on you. Any¬thing prior to this can't be called a commitment because you don't know what you are committing to. It would be like saying you'll do a job before you know what the job entails and whether or not you are even qualified to do it. In other words, commitment is impossible until you’ve really developed the ability to be intimate with one another and to respect your partner for who they really are. I suspect that it will take a couple of years of getting to know someone before commitment is even a possibility. People who commit to a relationship before they fully realize what they are committing to aren't actually making a commitment at all. Rather, their commitment is more likely a manipulation to get their needs met.

7. GIVING: This is the final component of love. Although you can give gifts in the beginning of your relationship, but your gift giving doesn't actually mean anything. Your gifts may even be manipulations to get someone else to love you. When you give gifts after you've made a commitment to love someone in a committed way, the giving becomes an act of love. You can give tangible gifts, or intangible ones, material gifts, or feelings and sentiments by writing love letters, etc. Whatever you do on a daily basis to tangibly show or let your partner know you love him or her is a gift. The more you can give, the deeper the love will grow. The gift giving must be mutual and it must be engaged in twenty-four hours a day.

Love is not something that you only do occasionally, but every moment whether you are in the mood or not. You have to do it because it fascinates you, the very concept and idea of it. Love must become totally compelling to you before you will be motivated to do all that work, and be so honest and self-revealing. As you practice the qualities of love, being loving will become a self-discipline. Once you start loving, you must never stop. If a relationship fails, you must process your failure by analyzing what went wrong and how you either created or allowed it. You must ask yourself what you could have done differently without judgment. After all, you did the best you could with the consciousness you had. Now that you have evolved, you can make a decision to do your next relationship differently. By exploring what went wrong, you are less likely to make those mistakes again. Be patient with yourself. It takes time to master the craft of loving. If you keep trying, in time you will create a truly loving relationship

Qualities Of Love

Love: we need it, we want it, but how do we go about it? If we knew, our world wouldn’t be war torn, and our relationships wouldn’t be filled with conflict. Love is simple, yet enormously complex. Since learning how to love appropriately is a big entire reason we come to the physical plane, it stands to reason that it would take lifetimes to achieve. Love requires different actions with different people. A parent loves a toddler differently than an adolescent. Partnership love is even different still. Then there is the world to love, other people, plants and animals, as well as loving one’s ideals, one’s higher self, or God/Goddess. Each requires a specific set of actions to produce a specific response. In this article I will be describing the principles of partnership love.

1. CARING: honestly caring about each other’s feelings in the relationship. When you care about someone, you care about how your behavior impacts them physically and emotionally. In order to feel good about a partnership, each person must be getting emotional, mental, spiritual and physical needs met. When this is occurring, the relationship is healthy for both people and adds to each person’s self-worth and self-esteem.

2. RESPONSIBILITY: we must take responsibility for the feelings the relationship is engendering, not for the other person. The most un loving thing you can do for others is to take away their opportunity to be responsible for the impact of their actions upon others. This is called enabling. It prevents all growth and transformation. If you are enabling someone else to be dysfunctional by cushioning them from the impact of their actions, you are not loving them. Rather, you are using the relationship to get your needs met without regard to the negative impact you are having on your partner’s spiritual growth.

You are not responsible for the reality others create, but you are responsible for the reality that you allow. According to Lazaris, we create our reality by either directly causing it through our behavior, (even "accidental" behaviors), or by allowing it. By choosing to be physical, we agreed to allow ourselves to be impacted by all the rules and realities of the physical plane. It is through this impact that we experience the pain or pleasure that motivates our evolution. This means that we agreed to allow ourselves to be impacted by the behavior of others. If a few people create global destruction, everyone allowed it for their growth and will have to deal with the consequences even though the majority of us did not actively create it. On a more personal note, if your partner is wrecking the family financially because he or she is an alcoholic who is drinking up all the money, you must take responsibility for what you needed to learn by choosing to allow this reality into your life. Taking responsibility means that there is no blame. When you process the experience, you must examine how it served you, as well as whether or not you dealt with it authentically. By sharing your feelings appropriately without slandering your partner’s character, and holding him or her accountable for the consequences of their actions, both you and your partner will grow.

3. KNOWING AND LEARNING: In each relationship there is a period of getting to know your partner and learning more and more about who they are, what they want in life, their desires and dreams, and what their agenda is, both hidden and explicit. As you get to know your partner’s likes and dislikes, through your reactions you conversely get to know yourself. For example, as you get to know your partner, you may discover that you have different sexual styles. As your partner leads you into sexual arenas that he or she enjoys but you’ve never tried, you’ll find out very quickly whether or not you share the same tastes. You must constantly seek to learn more about yourself and your partner. Never become complacent thinking that you've learned all there is to know. No matter how much inner work you’ve done, there will always be more to learn about yourself. And no matter how long you are with your partner, there will always be more to learn about him or her.

4. BEING INTIMATE: All conflict is an opportunity to create greater intimacy. When conflict arises, you must state your reactions and feelings without slandering your partner’s character. Then you must be willing to take total responsibility for your feelings by processing them in an open minded way. The “I’m right and you’re wrong” way, and “you’re a jerk because you think, feel and act that way” isn’t intimacy. Rather, that’s a declaration of war that never generates a positive response. Because it’s an attack on the other person’s self-esteem, it generates counter attack. True intimacy is the ability to open-mindedly explore the stories you each tell yourself about the activity that’s causing you to have the conflict. You must also explore what I call the “story beneath the story,” which are hidden beliefs, attitudes, thoughts and feelings the story is based upon. If you can do this exploration honestly and openly, without creating defensiveness or a need to be right and make the other person wrong, you have the opportunity to truly get to know one another.

This is often difficult to do because sometimes what we discover when we honestly explore the story beneath the story are things about ourselves that we may not be proud of, or that are socially unacceptable in the culture at large. It may also force you to reveal a hidden agenda that isn’t loving, such as being in a relationship not because you love your partner but because you like their financial support, which means you are using them for personal gain. It may take great courage to share these things, but when you share them in an atmosphere of open-minded acceptance and are also willing to take responsibility for what you find, it becomes easier.

Problems arise when what is revealed is threatening to one or both people in the relationship. It is in this phase of love that you may discover that you share differing agendas, or what John Gottman, in his book The Seven Principles That Make Marriage Work, calls “irreconcilable dreams.” There is a larger story beneath the story that may reveal unexplored beliefs about personal inadequacy, a lack of self-worth, or an inability to find and live one’s own dreams. This information would cause someone to further explore where the beliefs that create these feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem came from. One must ask oneself if they are true, and what needs to be done to change the mental or circumstantial reality that is causing them if they are. It might also cause a person to explore talents and develop potentials more fully. This kind of honesty can lead to enormous growth and change, which is what eventually produces true love.

In another common example, you may discover that your partner only feels fulfilled sexually in an open relationship where they have access to many sexual partners. You, on the other hand, only feel fulfilled in a monogamous one. Although one’s religion and culture may say that open relationships are immoral, which is why it may be hard for these facts to be revealed, the truth is that as long as no one is being hurt and everyone is open and honest about what they are doing, this activity is merely a matter of preference. It will only destroy the relationship if it’s an un matching agenda or “irreconcilable dream” that the other partner can’t agree to. When we become truly intimate, we discover our unmatching agendas, as well as our matching ones. Once discovered, you enter into the fifth quality of love: respect.

5. RESPECT: This is the hardest and most determined aspect of love, especially if you have a co-dependent relationship with your partner in which property and children are involved. You must respect other people's right to be the way they are without needing or wanting to change them, even if there are parts of their personality that you don't like, don't approve of, or scare you. Trying to change. people isn't respecting their right to be who they are. Because you can't change anybody, you must accept them the way they are. If they have an agenda that you don’t share, or are behaving in a way that isn’t enjoyable to you and they do not want to change this, you must tell yourself the truth about how likely you are to feel fulfilled in the relationship. If you are not likely to feel fulfilled, you probably won’t be happy. You must then decide whether or not you want to stay in the relationship. If you decide to stay, you must do so without resentment or bitterness. If you decide to leave, you can still love them, but you will do so from afar.

Love doesn't involve manipulation. As a loving person, although you can invite change, you don't require it. You can love someone but realize that a life spent with them will ultimately be unfulfilling because you won’t be getting your needs met. In fact, if staying with someone whose behavior is un-enjoyable enables them to be unloving, it is not a loving act. This quality is the most determined, taking the greatest will and determination to do, for it isn't always easy. Anyone can do the first three steps. Step four requires a high degree of responsibility and step five the highest of all. This step challenges us to do the right thing whether it's comfortable or not. People who can do the first three steps but not the fourth or fifth are just acting like they are loving when they actually aren't. Though you may say you love each other, you are actually deceiving yourselves. In fact, if you are confused in a relationship because things aren’t adding up, the chances are good that there are hidden agendas that aren’t being expressed and may even be actively denied.

6. COMMITMENT: This is intricately linked to intimacy. In fact, until you've created intimacy, commitment is meaningless. To be committed to someone is to take intense and total responsibility with them for the reality that you are jointly creating. In other words, the commitment is about continuously creating and maintaining the love that exists between you by authentically expressing your feelings and concerns and processing your conflicts together. When you commit to someone, it means that you are willing to process your conflict with them no matter what they do, how much they hurt you, or let you down. This kind of commitment can only come after you’ve thoroughly engaged the other five actions. You must first have been caring and responsible with and for each other. You must have learned more and more about each other and, when conflicts arise, become more intimate. Then you must choose to respect your partner, either choosing to love them from afar if the relationship won’t ultimately fulfill you, or staying in it without resentment or bitterness and without needing your partner to change. If you stay, you can then make a commitment to continuously care about how your behavior impacts your partner and to express your feelings when your partner has a negative impact on you. Any¬thing prior to this can't be called a commitment because you don't know what you are committing to. It would be like saying you'll do a job before you know what the job entails and whether or not you are even qualified to do it. In other words, commitment is impossible until you’ve really developed the ability to be intimate with one another and to respect your partner for who they really are. I suspect that it will take a couple of years of getting to know someone before commitment is even a possibility. People who commit to a relationship before they fully realize what they are committing to aren't actually making a commitment at all. Rather, their commitment is more likely a manipulation to get their needs met.

7. GIVING: This is the final component of love. Although you can give gifts in the beginning of your relationship, but your gift giving doesn't actually mean anything. Your gifts may even be manipulations to get someone else to love you. When you give gifts after you've made a commitment to love someone in a committed way, the giving becomes an act of love. You can give tangible gifts, or intangible ones, material gifts, or feelings and sentiments by writing love letters, etc. Whatever you do on a daily basis to tangibly show or let your partner know you love him or her is a gift. The more you can give, the deeper the love will grow. The gift giving must be mutual and it must be engaged in twenty-four hours a day.

Love is not something that you only do occasionally, but every moment whether you are in the mood or not. You have to do it because it fascinates you, the very concept and idea of it. Love must become totally compelling to you before you will be motivated to do all that work, and be so honest and self-revealing. As you practice the qualities of love, being loving will become a self-discipline. Once you start loving, you must never stop. If a relationship fails, you must process your failure by analyzing what went wrong and how you either created or allowed it. You must ask yourself what you could have done differently without judgment. After all, you did the best you could with the consciousness you had. Now that you have evolved, you can make a decision to do your next relationship differently. By exploring what went wrong, you are less likely to make those mistakes again. Be patient with yourself. It takes time to master the craft of loving. If you keep trying, in time you will create a truly loving relationship

Love And Lust

love is a strong connection between two individuals that can have a sexual connotation but is not limited to one. love is the tie that binds friends family and communities.

lust is a completely biologically-based sexual feeling that serves to fulfill reproductive urges.

the big difference between the two is that love is an emotion and lust is an urge. while the two are often experienced together, both can be felt separately without any hint of the other.

for example: you see a person on the street that catches your eye and you immediately fantasize about having sex with them. just because you are attracted to them and are smitten with lust does not neccessarily mean that you care about their well being and have a strong emotional bond with them.

the converse is also true. you have strong feelings of love for you family (most people do anyway) but you do not want to have sex with them. this is also true of close friends. we all have had a friend or two that we could never picture having sex with. (this is especially true in hetero friendships with the same sex and gay male/ straight female friendships, or vice versa).

so yeah, id say that there is a big difference between the two. but thats just my opinion. feel free to counterpoint.

God's Kind Of Love In Marriage

There are very few things in our world today that were ever a part of God's perfect plan for mankind. The elaborate government systems, with all their checks and balances and laws, would not be necessary if it were not for the corruption that sin produced. The monetary system, with all the buying and selling, would not be necessary in a sinless world that did unto others as they would have others do unto them. And many other things that we consider institutions in our society were never intended by God, but simply are ways of trying to cope with and control the perversion that entered the world through sin.

But one thing that God established while man was still in a sinless condition and said that it was not good for man to do without was marriage. Genesis 2:18 says, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet sufficient for him." A perfect man who had none of the pressures or problems that we know of today still was not complete without a mate. And it was not Adam who approached God about the situation and asked for a companion. Adam didn't know what he was missing! It was God who initiated the whole thing because that was His perfect plan. This all emphasises the high priority that marriage should have in our lives. However, it has not usually held that position.

Even we Christians today have put very little effort into our marriages, and therefore, we have gotten very little out of them. We have had our vision of what a blessing God intended marriage to be, dulled by the sorry examples of marriage we see around us today. Second Corinthians 10:12 says, "But they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise." This is what has happened over the years. Most couples have no idea of what God intended marriage to be, so they settle for the same substandard relations that they see others experiencing. They think conflict is just a part of marriage; and a couple that simply coexists without outward battles is considered to be an ideal couple, although that couple may have a cold war raging. After all, everybody is having trouble with their marriages today.

Well, I am pleased to announce that not everybody is having trouble with their marriages today! The Lord is moving mightily in this area, and regardless of what the rest of the world experiences, Christians can have God's best in their homes. God instituted marriage, so He certainly knows how to make it work properly. The only reason two out of three marriages in America end up in divorce is because the people involved don't follow the instructions God gave concerning marriage. It is that simple. The solution is not easy, but it is that simple.

What does God say about marriage? From Ephesians 5:22-33, we get quite a bit of instruction. This article doesn't allow us enough space to deal with everything these scriptures minister concerning marriage, but certainly one principle that is interwoven throughout them all is love: God's kind of love. It is important that you realize that God's institution of marriage will only work with God's kind of love.

In counseling hundreds of couples, I have found that many Christians, even those baptized with the Holy Ghost, are still operating toward each other with the same carnal love they had before they were Christians. In many cases, they have started trying to apply God's love to their brothers and sisters in the body and have developed a "burden for the lost," but are virtually the same in their relationships with their mates. God's kind of love has to be applied to our marriages too.

One of the most striking differences to me between the world's love and God's kind of love is that you can teach yourself to operate in God's love. Titus 2:4 says that the older women are to teach the younger women "to love their husbands, to love their children." Carnal love is completely motivated by the emotions or senses, but God's love comes from the heart, and although the feelings are definitely affected, they don't motivate or deter God's love.

Carnal love is characterized by a naked, little, fat boy who goes around shooting people with arrows to cause them to "fall" in love or to "fall" out of love. That simply is not true love. God's love is the same yesterday, today, and forever. That is the way God is (Heb. 13:8) and God is love (1 John 4:8). People who love one minute and then their mood changes and they act the opposite way the next minute, simply don't operate in God's love. You may feel like reacting in anger, but you can choose to operate in love.

Many people are confused about this and think, I can't act like I love them when I don't feel it. Oh, yes you can! God's Word tells us to even love our enemies (Matt. 5:44). It is a command. He didn't say to do it if you felt like it. If you will choose to do what God tells you to, your feelings will follow. You can teach yourself to love with God's kind of love.

A person who is truly born again desires to do what God says but doesn't always feel like it. Our feelings have been corrupted by our old lives before we came to Christ. Now that we are in Christ, we have His promise that our spirits have been totally changed (2 Cor. 5:17) and have become like Him. Galatians 5:22 says that love is a part of the fruit of the Spirit. This is specifically speaking of the Holy Spirit; but our new man was born of the Spirit, so it has to be true that God's love has been shed abroad in our spirits too. We do have God's love in our new man. Our feelings are not automatically changed, however. Our feelings will continue to act like they were taught to act until we subdue them and bring them under the control of our spirit man. It is not hypocritical to act in love when you don't feel it. It is actually hypocritical to act on what you feel instead of who you really are in Christ Jesus.

God's kind of love is a choice that you make on the basis of what God said, and then act on it in faith until it becomes a reality in your spirit, soul, and body.

If you can receive this basic truth about God's love, then you can begin to be consistent in your love to your mate because your love is based on a choice that you have made, not on the way they act. This is the root cause of nearly all strife in marriage. Everything is fine until one partner does something wrong to the other, and then the feathers fly. Aren't you glad that God doesn't treat us that way? Romans 5:8 says, "God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Praise God! God's love wasn't based upon what we had done for Him or what we deserved but upon His choice to love us. That is all! We didn't do anything to merit God's love. He just chose to give it. We can choose to receive that kind of love and then give it to others in the same way.

Another way to say this is that God's love is unconditional. Jesus didn't wait until we were worth it or had repented before He gave Himself for our sins. He gave Himself for us while we were yet sinners and living a life of rebellion against Him (Rom. 5:8). His love was extended toward Hitler just as much as it was toward us. The difference is our acceptance or rejection of it not His offer of love. God's love is unconditional.

We have to put this unconditional love of God to work in our marriages. If you live with a person for any length of time at all, you are going to find fault with them. If your love isn't unconditional, then you will begin to give them what they deserve, which is trouble. And you can rest assured that when you make a mistake, you will reap what you have sown.

I used to work in a dark room in a photography studio. We had a joke about these ladies who would come in to see their proofs and just throw a fit about how bad their pictures looked. They would say, "This picture doesn't do me justice!" Our answer would be, "Lady, you don't need justice, you need mercy." That's the way it is in marriage. Our mates, who see us at our worst, have to give us mercy, not justice. Failure in this area is the root of most marriage problems. Many couples actually use their conditional love as a weapon to try and motivate their mates to do things. That will destroy a marriage. If the thing that keeps your mate in line is a fear of your exploding if they mess up, then you are tormenting them. That's what 1 John 4:18 says, "Fear hath torment." You may see some results through that method, but it's a fact that you are building resentment and rejection in them, and sooner or later, it will explode. God's love is unconditional.

God Loves Us So Much!

The love of God is not based on what we have, what we do, or what we achieve in life. His immense love is not determined by our behavior, our attitude or our conduct. The love of God is not dependent on our personal background, our birth status, or our social standing. God’s love is not influenced by anything that we do in and of ourselves. In all of creation His love is like no other.

 Romans 8:35-39

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Wow, what a comfort, what a blessing, what joy there is in the love from our Lord to know that no hardships, troubles, lack of finances, nothing we can ever experience no matter how hard, trying or terrible things get, nothing can separate us from the love of God.

No hardship or distress we might encounter in life can be so overwhelming that Gods love for you does not increase as what you are going through intensifies. At these moments His love grows strong. Such is not the human condition. There is no pain in life so powerful that Gods love does not bring you comfort.

In life there may be times when you are hungry, but you will never hunger for lack of the Father’s love. In life sometimes we are abandoned by those we love as financial dire circumstances beset us. But poverty or lack of finances cannot rob you of God’s compassion, just as even death itself is not capable of robbing us of our Father’s infinite love

Proverbs 3:11-1

My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline
and do not resent his rebuke,

Because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father, we are the children he delights in. As our heavenly Father the love He gives and demonstrates for us is 100% unconditional. Even if we are disobedient, get angry with God, follow our own will, He still loves us, even when we do not love Him in return. John tells us 1 John 4:19 we love because He first loved us. His love for us as “Abba” our heavenly Father is so vast and wide that he has made us heirs and has built a home for us in heaven and awaits the day when our flesh no longer remains, and we are as Paul wrote, absent from the body, and present with the Lord. So these are the thing and definitions of our heavenly Father in the Bible.

He has adopted us and made us his children through the blood of his Son Ephesians 1:5 ….he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—God, “Abba” our heavenly father desires an intimate relationship with us, his children. He is our comfort, and our strength. There are no arms bigger to hold you, and there is no love greater than His.

He alone is “Abba”, dad, daddy, papa, and Father in every sense of the word. What a glorious blessing we have to have Him as our parent, and how precious and wonderful it is to be His child.

Romans 8:15 Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.”

The adopted child’s past from their natural-born family is removed, legally forgotten and sealed as if it did not ever exist once they were adopted. The child then gained all the rights of a legitimate child in their new family. They got a new father, and they became an heir to the father’s estate. The adopted child became equal co-heirs with the other children. In the eyes of the law their old life was completely wiped out. All debts were completely cancelled. That child was absolutely the child of their new father. We are that child; our debt of sin has been cancelled by the blood of Jesus. We are a new child in God, by the Blood of the Lamb. Paul tells us in Corinthians that once we are in Christ we have become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! In that new life we are the sons and daughters of God, part of the inheritance of a royal priesthood, receivers of eternal life. Now that is a heritage to remember. That is a heritage to be proud of. That is a heritage to be thankful for.  What a glorious privilege we have to be the absolute possession of God our Father! As his children we take on the name of God—we are His children, His heirs, and His ambassadors.

God chose you and me to be His child. What an amazing, incredible gift. We were taken from a situation which would not have turned out well and in Christ Jesus we are given the opportunity to be adopted and live as God’s own children, and become a member of His family. We have been given a new identity, a new name, a new life, and a new inheritance.

Isaiah 30:18

But the Lord wants to show you kindness. He greatly desires to show you compassion. The Lord is the God who makes everything right again. So those people who trust Him are truly happy.

You are God’s people. Do not weep anymore. The Lord hears your cry for help. And when He hears, He will answer. He will come to your aid. You have suffered much in the past. But the Lord is your Teacher. He will not hide Himself from you. You will see with your own eyes what He will do to save you.

In Isaiah 30:18, we read about the real desire and heart that God has for us. In his Word, we read of His promises to us. It is His desire to give us this and more, if we put Him first and foremost in our lives and lay aside all other things.

Know that you can see the hand of God in your life and experience His kindness. Your life will turn around and everything that has gone wrong will begin to go right. You will find happiness as your worries, stress and fears, vanish. God will reveal Himself to you and you will know Him.

Know that no matter how bad your situation is, whether you are in debt or trouble, God promises to rescue you. It is in His Word…..it is possible, probable, and His desire for you.

We need to realize the honor we have in the love of God, and we need to understand the strength and depth of His love. His love working in us is to every believer as motherhood, apple pie and baseball is to the American way.

When we are troubled, as we all are from time to time, He is our place of refuge; a place where our spirit feels at home. In Him is where the longing of our soul finds rest and peace. When in our own flesh all avenues are blocked, we can always connect with God and be comforted.

If you are troubled, in doubt, confused, needing guidance, direction, correction or instruction, just turn to God. He will feed your soul until you hunger and thirst no more. When you cannot find the words, He will speak for you. When you cannot find the answer with all your human logic, He will enlighten you.

He will bring tears of joy to your soul that wash away all the stress and sorrow from your entire being. There is an unseen language spoken by God to your heart that your spirit comprehends, even though we cannot explain it with our human tongue, it is spoken and imprinted upon our hearts by the Spirit of the living God within us. In that unseen language His word transcends my human knowledge and opens a line of communicate between us and God in all of its glory and wonder. We will find ourselves lost in the depth of His love, as a child nursing at its mother’s breast. We will be compelled by His Spirit, and amazed as we encounter what the flesh cannot comprehend.

The Lord invites you to expand your spirit and see things beyond what your human eyes can behold and you begin to see things through your spirit. This is where the fullness and richness of life lies and awaits you, in God’s love.

He pours out his love upon each one of us every second every day. His love is our everything. Even when we are unaware He is working in love, behind the scenes protecting us from danger and saving us from you from catastrophe.  His love gives us strength, energy and the will to go on when we desperately needed it. If we will but look closely at all those many very wonderful and unexpected things that occur in our lives, you will see the deep love of God at the center of all our joy, happiness and success.

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

That is a lot of love, the life-giving love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord who redeems us all from sin.

Download "Murder Dem" by Zubidagr8est

http://t.co/icriQ8lN Have you heard this sound from Zubidagr8test? Its titled "Murder Dem" oh he really killed this one now, download, listen and enjoy! Don't worry thank me later.. *wink*

Download Asa Nwa By Mr Raw!

http://t.co/pVqreMXh  From the album "THE GREATEST" by Mr Raw this track Asa Nwa meaning (fine girl) has been made easy for you to listen and you're just one click away,so download ASA NWA – MR RAW ft Bonesnack, enjoy your weekend!

Download Asa Nwa By Mr Raw!

From the album "THE GREATEST" by Mr Raw this track Asa Nwa meaning (fine girl) has been made easy for you to listen and you're just one click away,so download ASA NWA – MR RAW ft Bonesnack http://t.co/pVqreMXh enjoy your weekend!

OH, WHY CAMILA

Camila was only 18 when she met bobby who was 23, they were young and vibrant Lovers and have dated for nine years,they were so inlove that they didn't think of the consequences of an oath before taking one.. They both bound themselves in an oath never to leave each other,their lives were beautiful together and they were the most happy people. Camila turned down suitors as well as bobby turned who down every form of seduction from women cause he was very handsome too but above all dedicated to his woman.

    Nine years later bobby was ready for marriage and on the 14th of February he surprised camila by proposing to her in front of his friends and family members,camila smiled and with so much excitement stretched out her fingers as bobby happily put a ring on her finger,their happiness knew no bound and the marriage plan began!

Bobby went to her village and paid her bride price, the both families were happy as well as bobby and camila,loosing each other was their greatest fear,and i call that "power of Love". After their traditional marriage camila still didn't move in with bobby and was waiting for the white wedding which they were preparing for, 2weeks for their wedding-invites to be out it crossed their minds to check their blood groups and geno-type and other necessary tests couples should run before marriage and off they went to the hospital and after the test they went to their houses in happiness.
A day later they went back to the hospital to get their results,the doctor handed over their results to them and happily they read through with smile on their faces only to realise camila's genotype was (AS )and Bobby's genotype was (AS) that's was the greatest shock of their lives,on reading that camila collapsed!
What would you do if you were in their shoes?
 Hope you enjoyed this real and touchy story?
 You need to know what happened next? I'll tell you, just stick around *wink*

God's Word About Love

What does the good book have to say about everyone's favorite subject at this time of the year -- love?
Describing a biblical view of love turns out to be no simple matter. First off, the Bible was written in both Hebrew and Greek, and each of these languages has multiple words that we translate as "love." (On this count, Hebrew wins out with about a dozen words expressing a range of emotions from sexual desire to intimate friendship, and from covenantal fidelity to acts of mercy and kindness.)
There are also understandings of love floating around among different authors. So what the author of the Song of Solomon says about love isn't the same as what the author(s) of Genesis say, which isn't the same as what John says, which isn't the same as Paul ... and so on. All of which means that not only is there no single view of love in the Bible but any larger scheme you propose by which to organize these various treatises on love will inevitably fall short.
Nevertheless it may still be a useful, if far from perfect, endeavor. To get at it, I'll borrow the classic formula that distinguishes between three Greek words: eros, romantic, passionate love, from which we get our word "erotic"; phileo, the love of great friends and siblings, from which we get "Philadelphia," the "city of brotherly love"; and agape, parental, self-sacrificing love that seeks only the welfare of the other. All three kinds of love are represented in the Bible, which means that all three are considered to be created and blessed by God.
Eros is the emotion we probably think of first when thinking of love, especially the love of Valentine's Day and pop music. While the word itself is not present in the Greek New Testament, it depicts the passionate desire that unites lover and beloved praised in the Song of Solomon. Its presence in the Bible testifies not only that humans are moved by beauty and desire, but also that passion, romance, and sexual intimacy are an essential element of God's good creation and the human experience.
Phileo, in contrast, is a more stable and constant emotion. Constancy not withstanding, however, phileo it is also a powerful emotion that captures the love of great friends. Jesus weeps for Lazarus, whom he loved (phileo) (John 11:35), while Jonathan and David share a bond so strong that it induces Jonathan to forsake allegiance to his father in support of his beloved friend. Phileo is ultimately not about passion as much as it is about commitment, the love that binds one to another in enduring friendship.
Agape dominates the New Testament but is more rare in contemporary literature of the Greek-speaking world of the first century. Scholars agree that it best captures what we might call "Christian love." Agape depicts the self-sacrificing love of a parent for a child and describes both God's love for the world as shown in Christ and the love Christians should show each other and all people. As to the former, think of Tim Tebow's - and, indeed, the world's - favorite Bible verse: "For God so loved - agape - the world that he gave his only Son..." (John 3:16). As to the latter, think of Paul's great hymn to love: "Love - agape - is patient and kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends" (1 Cor. 13:4-8a).
As nice and neat as these distinctions are, however, as soon as you make them you begin to watch them unravel. For many have wondered if Jonathan's friendship with David was not tinged with a hint of eros even as it also embodies the self-sacrificing love of agape. And, truth be told, agape and phileo are often used interchangeably in the New Testament. Jesus, as it turns out, loves Lazarus in terms of both phileo (John 11:35) and agape (11:5). And while Paul at points depicts marriage as a remedy for the consuming, burning passions of sexual desire we associate with eros (1 Cor. 7:9), he - or at least his disciples - also expect husbands and wives to exhibit agape for each other by being subject to each other as Christ loved and sacrificed himself for the Church (Ephesians 5). What, then, are we to make of "love" in the Bible?
But maybe this somewhat blurry picture of love suits the complicated nature of the subject at hand. I mean, even Valentine's Day itself has a peculiar and complex history. Originally named for a saint (or saints, depending on the tradition) that were martyred for their commitment to their faith, over the centuries Valentine's Day came to epitomize the romantic ardor of lovers represented by the Roman god of desire, Cupid (the Romanized version of the Greek god Eros). And today one might be forgiven for thinking that V-Day is mainly about love for chocolate and lingerie.
Perhaps, then, the Bible's convoluted treatment is fitting. After all, isn't this mixture of emotions and motivations pretty representative of our experience? We love our partners and our children and our pets and friend and, if we're lucky, our jobs and hobbies and much more, but not all in the same way. And even our love for a single person varies and changes, not just over the years, but over the span of moments, as passion can turn to tenderness, which can turn to a desire to protect and serve, and then turn back to desire, all between the beats of a simultaneously fickle and courageous heart. In light of this, maybe the best we can say is that love in the Bible, like love in our everyday lives, is important, complicated, and at times a bit squishy. That is, it is too powerful and mysterious to be fully defined or grasped by any of us.
So perhaps for now it's enough to recognize that all the different kinds of love we have explored are part and parcel of our life in this world, that God created and blessed them for our nurture, and that behind and beyond all of our expressions of love is God's love for each of us. That's not everything we could say, of course, but I think that if we get that much straight we've probably gotten the heart of what the Bible has to say about love.

LOVE AND ROMANCE

We've all experienced love. We've loved (and been loved by) parents, brothers, sisters, friends, even pets. But romantic love is different. It's an intense, new feeling unlike any of these other ways of loving.


Why Do We Fall in Love?
Loving and being loved adds richness to our lives. When people feel close to others they are happier and even healthier. Love helps us feel important, understood, and secure.

But each kind of love has its own distinctive feel. The kind of love we feel for a parent is different from our love for a baby brother or best friend. And the kind of love we feel in romantic relationships is its own unique type of love.

Our ability to feel romantic love develops during adolescence. Teens all over the world notice passionate feelings of attraction. Even in cultures where people are not allowed to act on or express these feelings, they're still there. It's a natural part of growing up to develop romantic feelings and sexual attractions to others. These new feelings can be exciting — or even confusing at first.

The Magical Ingredients of Love Relationships
Love is such a powerful human emotion that experts are constantly studying it. They've discovered that love has three main qualities:

Attraction is the "chemistry" part of love. It's all about the physical — even sexual — interest that two people have in each other. Attraction is responsible for the desire we feel to kiss and hold the object of our affection. Attraction is also what's behind the flushed, nervous-but-excited way we feel when that person is near.
Closeness is the bond that develops when we share thoughts and feelings that we don't share with anyone else. When you have this feeling of closeness with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you feel supported, cared for, understood, and accepted for who you are. Trust is a big part of this.
Commitment is the promise or decision to stick by the other person through the ups and downs of the relationship.
These three qualities of love can be combined in different ways to make different kinds of relationships. For example, closeness without attraction is the kind of love we feel for best friends. We share secrets and personal stuff with them, we support them, and they stand by us. But we are not romantically interested in them.

Attraction without closeness is more like a crush or infatuation. You're attracted to someone physically but don't know the person well enough yet to feel the closeness that comes from sharing personal experiences and feelings.

Romantic love is when attraction and closeness are combined. Lots of relationships grow out of an initial attraction (a crush or "love at first sight") and develop into closeness. It's also possible for a friendship to move from closeness into attraction as two people realize their relationship is more than "just like" and they have become interested in one another in a romantic way.

For people falling in love for the first time, it can be hard to tell the difference between the intense, new feelings of physical attraction and the deeper closeness that goes with being in love.

Lasting Love or Fun Fling?
The third ingredient in a love relationship, commitment, is about wanting and deciding to stay together as a couple in the future — despite any changes and challenges that life brings.

Sometimes couples who fall in love in high school develop committed relationships that last. Many relationships don't last, though. But it's not because teens aren't capable of deep loving.

We typically have shorter relationships as teens because adolescence is a time when we instinctively seek lots of different experiences and try out different things. It's all part of discovering who we are, what we value, and what we want out of life.

Another reason we tend to have shorter relationships in our teens is because the things we want to get out of a romantic relationship change as we get a little older. In our teens — especially for guys — relationships are mainly about physical attraction. But by the time guys reach 20 or so, they rate a person's inner qualities as most important. Teen girls emphasize closeness as most important — although they don't mind if a potential love interest is cute too!



In our teens, relationships are mostly about having fun. Dating can seem like a great way to have someone to go places with and do things with. Dating can also be a way to fit in. If our friends are all dating someone, we might put pressure on ourselves to find a boyfriend or girlfriend too.

For some people dating is even a status thing. It can almost seem like another version of cliques: The pressure to go out with the "right" person in the "right" group can make dating a lot less fun than it should be — and not so much about love!

In our late teens, though, relationships are less about going out to have fun and fitting in. Closeness, sharing, and confiding become more important to both guys and girls. By the time they reach their twenties, most girls and guys value support, closeness, and communication, as well as passion. This is the time when people start thinking about finding someone they can commit to in the long run — a love that will last.

What Makes a Good Relationship?
When people first experience falling in love, it often starts as attraction. Sexual feelings can also be a part of this attraction. People at this stage might daydream about a crush or a new BF or GF. They may doodle the person's name or think of their special someone while a particular song is playing.

It sure feels like love. But it's not love yet. It hasn't had time to grow into emotional closeness that's needed for love. Because feelings of attraction and sexual interest are new, and they're directed at a person we want a relationship with, it's not surprising we confuse attraction with love. It's all so intense, exciting, and hard to sort out.

The crazy intensity of the passion and attraction phase fades a bit after a while. Like putting all our energy into winning a race, this kind of passion is exhilarating but far too extreme to keep going forever. If a relationship is destined to last, this is where closeness enters the picture. The early passionate intensity may fade, but a deep affectionate attachment takes its place.

Some of the ways people grow close are:

Learning to give and receive. A healthy relationship is about both people, not how much one person can get from (or give to) the other.
Revealing feelings. A supportive, caring relationship allows people to reveal details about themselves — their likes and dislikes, dreams and worries, proud moments, disappointments, fears, and weaknesses.
Listening and supporting. When two people care, they offer support when the other person is feeling vulnerable or afraid. They don't put down or insult their partner, even when they disagree.
Giving, receiving, revealing, and supporting is a back-and-forth process: One person shares a detail, then the other person shares something, then the first person feels safe enough to share a little more. In this way, the relationship gradually builds into a place of openness, trust, and support where each partner knows that the other will be there when times are tough. Both feel liked and accepted for who they are.

The passion and attraction the couple felt early on in the relationship isn't lost. It's just different. In healthy, long-term relationships, couples often find that intense passion comes and goes at different times. But the closeness is always there.

Sometimes, though, a couple loses the closeness. For adults, relationships can sometimes turn into what experts call "empty love." This means that the closeness and attraction they once felt is gone, and they stay together only out of commitment. This is not usually a problem for teens, but there are other reasons why relationships end.

Why Do Relationships End?
Love is delicate. It needs to be cared for and nurtured if it is to last through time. Just like friendships, relationships can fail if they are not given enough time and attention. This is one reason why some couples might not last — perhaps someone is so busy with school, extracurriculars, and work that he or she has less time for a relationship. Or maybe a relationship ends when people graduate and go to separate colleges or take different career paths.

For some teens, a couple may grow apart because the things that are important to them change as they mature. Or maybe each person wants different things out of the relationship. Sometimes both people realize the relationship has reached its end; sometimes one person feels this way when the other does not.

Moving On
Losing love can be painful for anyone. But if it's your first real love and the relationship ends before you want it to, feelings of loss can seem overwhelming. Like the feelings of passion early in the relationship, the newness and rawness of grief and loss can be intense — and devastating. There's a reason why they call it a broken heart.

When a relationship ends, people really need support. Losing a first love isn't something we've been emotionally prepared to cope with. It can help to have close friends and family members to lean on. Unfortunately, lots of people — often adults — expect younger people to bounce back and "just get over it." If your heart is broken, find someone you can talk to who really understands the pain you're going through.

It seems hard to believe when you're brokenhearted that you can ever feel better. But gradually these feelings grow less intense. Eventually, people move on to other relationships and experiences.

Relationships — whether they last 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years, or a lifetime — are all opportunities to experience love on its many different levels. We learn both how to love and how to be loved in return.

Romance provides us with a chance to discover our own selves as we share with someone new. We learn the things we love about ourselves, the things we'd like to change, and the qualities and values we look for in a partner.

Loving relationships teach us self-respect as well as respect for others. Love is one of the most fulfilling things we can have in our lives. If romance hasn't found you yet, don't worry — there's plenty of time. And the right person is worth the wait.