Accepting a Marriage Proposal: Rules of Engagement

Dating can be fun and a time for hanging out and having fun. However, what happens when the dating is taken to the next level by a proposal of marriage? Maybe it is something the women kept hoping for and finally gave up. Maybe it was never even anticipated until the moment of the proposal. It doesn't matter how, or even when it happens, what matters most is, should the proposal be accepted? There are several factors that any female should take into consideration before becoming engaged, because obviously, the next step would be a marriage. Love, not lust should be the first reason for anyone to contemplate a martial union. The length of time a person has already known the person they intend to marry. There has been a lot that has been said about how opposites attract. However it is very important that you share at least some interests. Often times a couple will separate because on down the road the only thing they have in common is some feelings at the start and sex. This is a good time to examine why you would accept the proposal and even why you are dating this man. Oftentimes, young ladies will want to jump into a marriage because they are miserable at their home living with their present family. Ladies, ask yourself these questions and then decide if it is time to get married: What are your expectations of the man you want to spend your life with? (Putting the love factor aside). I tell a lot of Christian females that this should be what they should look for in a man. Do they love God first? Is there equal spiritual ground? This is so very important. You can both believe in God, but is it the same God? It won't be too mismatched if one of you are a little more stronger in your faith. But just make sure you are both on the same page of whom God is? How does he treat his mother, his sisters or other female figures beside you? If he treats his mother good, then more then likely, he will also treat you good, too. What kind of financial issues is he dealing with? Has he ever been arrested? How is his school attendance and grades been? Is he over indulgent in any type of sports or anything that will distract him from being a good mate? Is he possessive or controlling? Let's face it: No one is perfect and we all have issues. However, you need to really observe all of these behaviors before accepting the engagement ring. Is he willing to work to take care of you? Will he have issues if you choose to maintain a job or go to college? Does he get jealous if others look at you? Does he have a roaming eye? Will he be committed to you or will he have other affairs? Once you put that ring on your finger and accept the engagement, it becomes a little more difficult to give back the ring and break the engagement. I have heard of a lot of people who had problems along the way during the engagement, but because everything was a planned out and the invitations had been sent out, the couple ended up married into a disastrous relationship that should not have happened. Please, don't be afraid to stop the whole thing if suddenly you find that there are things you know will make you miserable on down the road. One thing I can't stress enough is communicate, communicate, and communicate. No relationship can last without being able to talk and discuss things. Another thing to remember also, is that in time all things change. Are you will to accept most of those changes? Remember, your vows are for better or worse. You need to ask him if he will accept you with the changes you will go through? You can watch how he treats people with disabilities or obese people. This will indicate to you how you may get treated if you suddenly ended up with a disability or put on some weight. How do you both feel about child bearing and child rearing? How does he treat children? Of course if you both do not want to have children, then that won't be an issue. Please, don't lie to yourself or to the man you might marry. If you both will take a realistic look at the whole picture, then you both may just be on your way to many happy and exciting years together! -Gracias por leer!